What I have in common with Jack Reacher

If you're not familiar with the excellent Jack Reacher series of crime thrillers by Lee Child, I highly suggest you get hooked: for sheer gritty detail and page-flipability, they're hard to beat.

In short, every book revolves around the central hero of Jack Reacher, an ex-military hard-ass who's wandering America, trying to just enjoy life but always drawn into solving other people's problems. Jack's unique in that he doesn't believe in working in a fixed job, owning a house, or surrounding himself with the trash that you and I are told we should desire. Apart from the great action, it's a refreshing narrative.

I'll be honest with you: in my 28 years in this world, I still haven't figured out why it's taken the shape it has in the glorified 'Western' world. Post-modern cynicism mixed with battle-weary religion, rampant capitalism, crashing poverty, the all-pervasive fear of crime, and above all else a culture of individualism.

Seriously people, in 200 000 years of humanity have we still not figured out some way to live together harmoniously? If you step back out of the rat-race for a bit, it's mind-boggling.

In a mini-string of stories I had published on a Romanian news site, I wrote that the desire to emigrate has had a significant impact on my view on life's challenges and my priorities. A spin-off of this is my view towards worldly possessions - you seriously start analysing every item you want to buy, asking yourself if it's something you'd put in your single suitcase of no more than 30kg when the chance to emigrate finally arrives.

I hate the fact that I have to live in fear of fellow human beings, all sharing this journey with me. I hate the fact that I'm meant to want a dream which is a plain lie - the majority of the world's population will never be so much as middle-class, never mind wealthy.

As a side-note about me, like so many other avid Grand Theft Auto fans around the world I can't wait for the imminent release of Grand Theft Auto V. That said, I'm desperately looking for a television which will be big enough to do the awesome graphics in the game justice, but cheap enough to feel disposable (because it won't fit in my suitcase - see analogy above). No luck yet.

However, this drove something home for me: you can buy a flat-screen TV for R3 500, R6 000, R16 000, R25 000 or R200 000! Yes, as you go up the price ranks you get 3D, bigger screens and internet-enabled 'smart' features, but really ... the easy observation here (if you step back enough to see it) is that you'll always be wanting a more expensive TV, and feeling rubbish about the one you have. The same thing goes for the car you drive, the house you live in, the clothes you wear, or where you sit in an airplane (economy, business class, first class or private jet!).

Don't get me wrong: I'm not a monk, about to quit my job and go live in a monastery. I like the human comforts as much as the next guy, and don't see anything wrong with wanting better for yourself - I just think humanity as a whole has lost the plot. That message was also driven home by the excellent movie I watched last night: Elysium.

We live in a world where people are starving of hunger, and other people are buying Bugattis. We live in a world where young kids are trying to support their extended families but cannot find jobs, while Robert Downey Junior earned $75 million last year. We live in a world where the US may invade Syria, because the Government may or may not have gassed a lot of innocent people with chemical weapons.

This isn't a world I want any part of. I certainly don't want to spend the next forty years of my life paying insurance, buying increasingly higher-priced consumer goods and just supporting the system happily.

For me the real problem is that The System, such as it is, is geared at splitting all of humanity up. We don't feel like we're in an extended family of 9 Billion people - we feel like we're trying to find a peaceful zone in a hurricane of humanity. Why is that?

Greed, weak political leadership, a corrupted social fabric ... blame it on what you will, the equally obvious observation is that it doesn't have to be this way. The way the world is now is just one possible outcome of a galaxy of options, and we continuously renew it through our support of the existing systems.

I'm not the first person to reach this realisation either. You just have to look at all the riots to realise that the next World War isn't about country vs country - it's about people as individuals against anybody they deem to be The Enemy. When you get enough of those individuals grouping together, the ramifications get serious real quickly: assembly plants shut down (there's a current automotive strike organised by unions in South Africa), private property is damaged, and police turn on the very people they're meant to protect.

It's all too Judge Dredd for me. Why can we group together to express our anger through violence, but we cannot unite to express our shared empathy for each other and work towards complex solutions? Sporadic acts of charity flit up here and there, but it's clear that it's way too little, too late. How do you choose which beggar to feed out of millions? How do you choose who to give a job to, out of a lost generation?

Humanity needs a new medium to communicate. Social change won't come through a Facebook group, however. A Facebook 'like' doesn't equate to a commitment to turning your world upside down in favour of long-term change. By 'upside down' I'm not advocating that we all return to an agrarian barter society - although the thought is appealing at times - but rather that we just find a way to work together, instead of laughing at each other cruelly through puppet politicians and the glossy pages of gossip magazines.

Who's with me?

For a start, I suggest we find some way of truly eliminating hunger or the fear thereof. It's as elemental as needs come, and the truth is that there still aren't enough soup kitchens for the poor (in 200 000 years!!!). If as an entire species we're not afraid of starving to death within two weeks if we 'fall through the cracks', I think it will have a landmark change on our collective psyche. It's something concrete to aim towards.

Does your world-view reflect you or the world?

Something I've often reflected on is where one draws the line between healthy optimism and living in denial.

As a South African, it's something you ask yourself a lot. Do you keep a running total of all the potholes in the street as you drive to work, and allow each one to make your mood a little bit worse - arriving at your office depressed and angry? Or do you set out from work with a plan to avoid the worst potholes, and rather admiring potholes which have been filled?

This can be applied anywhere, of course. What weighting do you give to your experiences? Are you depressed if you get cut off in traffic, AND the ATM you try using isn't working, AND your cellphone call gets dropped by the network, AND you buy a sandwich is stale, AND you realise you cannot afford that thing you really want?

Or do you manage to view all of these incidents separately instead of cumulatively, and measure them against all the times you had a great time driving and singing to your favourite song on the radio, AND you withdrew money effortlessly from ATMs, AND you had ate really great sandwiches, AND you spent hours talking to people you care about on your cellphone?

It's difficult to find balance in our own lives, and far more so when we try to present any semblance of the 'truth' to other people. All we can hope to represent is the truth for ourselves at this very moment, in this context, in this society, in this country, given our current emotional state.

Obviously the thing that got me thinking about this was disagreeing with a certain author about a certain book he's written about Romania. It turned out to be a collection of a wide range of negative microcosms, and in my view (right now in this country at this time given how I'm feeling - lol) it's insanely difficult to present an objective snapshot of a country.

If you think about it, you could write a book about all the experiences you feel and thoughts you have while drinking your morning cup of coffee - clearly summarising years' worth of experiences in a foreign country into a few hundred pages is going to be an exercise in omission rather than inclusion.

The same thing goes for this blog, of course. I'd like to think that as I learn about Romania, my 'voice' and insights into the country change. There are a million ways to emigrate to a country, so my experiences are only going to be informative in that they happened to me, rather than that they'd necessarily happen to you (e.g. if you're not married to a Romanian woman, you're going to have a very different path in).

All the way back in April I said in an e-mail that this is what I was really hoping for, when I looked in vain between travel guides for any mention of Romania at all between 'Portugal' and 'Rome':

I've realised that what I want from Romania I'm not going to find in a book. At least, I don't think anybody's written the kind of book about Romania I'd like to read ... a road-trip across Romania, heavily illustrated with photographs, details about every area visited, a little bit of historical background, discussions with Romanians about life in Romania ... and maybe a nice DVD packaged with it featuring video footage of the trip.

Here's to hoping I get a chance to write that book, and am lucky enough to find a distribution agent for it. I just don't know if the world is ready for a Romania without Dracula and an over-riding focus on Communist throwbacks in it - the sad truth is that the real, rich, vibrant and complex truth of a country gets lost too easily, especially when commercial interests are involved. For now, blogging it is :)

Humour for a Friday

It's a Friday, so nobody wants anything serious now, right? Right. I give you this YouTube vid, featuring Kia's old mascots on a slim-down session:

Language Woes - Part II

Yes, I know I've already blogged about some Romanians' creative use of English, but I ask you with tears in my eyes, why is Ikea's Romanian website only in Romanian?

I take it all back, Romania. Give me your bravely misspelled words and creative grammar! At least I can figure out what you're saying, whereas on the IKEA page I'm hopelessly lost. My Romanian lessons haven't extended as far as 'bed' yet :/

Why does a South African care whether a multinational furniture chain in Romania has an English-language version of their website? Simply because I'll be visiting Bucharest in December, and I need to buy a bed (not all foreigners stay in hotels *gasp*). IKEA had been recommended to me by an expat for being conveniently close to Otopeni airport, but after this I don't know.

Anybody know 'sleeping bag' in Romanian? LOL

An Open Letter to UKIP

This is an open letter to Nigel Farage, leader of the United Kingdom Independence Party, partly in response to this article and more broadly to his generally thoughtless and hurtful use of untrue stereotypes around Romanians and Bulgarians to ultimately leverage the UK out of the European Union.

16 August 2013

Dear Nigel

I understand where you're coming from. You're a politician, desperate for any leverage which will assist you in swinging the public opinion towards supporting you. For better or worse you want to get the UK out of Europe, and you've decided that stoking fears about Romanians and Bulgarians will help you get there.

Personally, I cannot forgive you for that. It's a cheap and de-humanising tactic. I'm not afraid of Romanians, and do you know why? I'm married to a beautiful example of the country, a woman who would certainly change your close-minded perceptions of the country single-handedly, and I count many others as friends and professional colleagues. The same goes for the Bulgarians I've met.

Am I being unfair towards you? I don't think so at all. Look at your latest comments in the article I refer to above. You talk about how you're 'saddened', refer to 'unlimited numbers' (of what, exactly??? individuals?) and describe all Romanians and Bulgarians as 'unskilled migrant workers'.

The funny thing here is that my wife lived in the UK for eight years, contributing to the economy and its people in a range of positions - certainly not as the unskilled (and lost to boot) taxi driver or manual labourer you've referred to previously. She was there perfectly legally with an Indefinite Leave to Remain.

When we met and got engaged - I'm South African, by the way - it posed the obvious question: so what now? Long story short, the great UK was happy to take hundreds of pounds from me with no refund when I applied for a residence visa, and rejected my application outright within a week without so much as contacting me personally. 

I knew where I wasn't wanted, so instead of running back to the UK and begging for them to reverse their decision, I took it on the chin (a good British attitude you'll appreciate no doubt). South Africa was willing to see the value in my wife (a Romanian) that the great UK didn't in me, and allowed her to join me here.

For reasons I can't go into detail about now, the time has come for us to move on. South Africa ultimately doesn't want us either, or me - as a citizen of the country. This saddens me, but I'm not looking for your sympathy. Racial politics is something which transcends even xenophobia.

My wife was in favour of us re-applying for entry to the UK, and I am personally against that. Not only do you damage the UK's global reputation with your thoughtless views towards Romanians and Bulgarians, but I'm sure that in a heartbeat you'd express the same sentiments towards me personally as a South African.

The UK doesn't deserve my wife or myself. It doesn't deserve our education, our skills, or our years' experience. It doesn't deserve our talents, our creativity, our hopes and dreams. This is something we were both at various times contributing directly to your country, or willing to bring to it. First the UK's Border Agency and now you have shown us the error in our ways.

I'm happy to take my wife back to Romania, and accompany her there. I'm under no illusions: life will be challenging and economics will be dire. However it always is, isn't it? Even in the great UK, the welfare state. Even in the US, with its first world status a facade built on shaky debt.

The plus is that Romania is a country with people who reject the cliches you and your ilk throw at them. It's a developing country, whereas the UK is a stagnating country which people like you are pushing over the brink by denying those eager and willing to work an opportunity to. It's easier for UK citizens to cripple the system with their laziness and welfare payouts - you're only too quick to ignore that damage.

My wife is the easier target for you, and so am I. Don't get me wrong, however. Despite everything I've said here, I don't hate you. I'm the one who's sorry for you and the tired old drum you feel that you have to keep on beating. It's ultimately going to doom the UK, and at the very least it has cost you everything my wife and I could and would have brought to the country and its people.

When you're next in South Africa, come for tea to discuss this further (yes, how British I know). Tell my wife to her face that she's an unskilled migrant that the UK should protect itself from as a top priority. There's a good chance we'll be in Bucharest by the time you get around to doing that, so we'll introduce some other real life Romanians. They're not all called Vlad, just in case that was another one of your fears.

Yours truly,

Leon Schnell

PS: I'm going to e-mail this to the only address I could find for the UKIP (there are only contact forms on your website). Maybe it gets through to you, maybe it doesn't. I tried.

Idea Share: Donating Money To Charity

I don't know what life is like where you are, but here in South Africa there is a desperate level of poverty and the consequent number of beggars at street corners (not as many as there actually could be) or the phenomenon of the car guard (people who spend their days in car parking lots and are intended to assist you in reversing out of your parking bay and nominally protect your car from random vandalism in return for small change).

A little while back I came up with an - given my last post, what I think is fairly original - idea to solve the growing problem of never having cash or coins on me, because I pay for everything by card. I dusted the idea off, and posted it here: Making Donations Easier

I'm sure this isn't a thing which is specific to South Africa, so a system like this would be equally applicable pretty much anywhere in the world. If the idea strikes a chord with you and you are technically able to develop it further, or want to invest money into it, you're welcome to use my idea. The only 'payment' I ask is that you let me know how the system goes, and that the idea always remains as a profit-free initiative to benefit the needy.

Good luck!

Somebody else has already thought that!

There are a few truisms I've figured out in my old age (ok, so I'm not yet 30, but who's counting?). The first of these is that there will always be somebody richer and somebody poorer than you - a LOT richer and poorer, both ways. The second is that there will always be somebody healthier and somebody sicker than you ... it's like all those male models with their ripped abdominal muscles put me off exercising altogether, but at least I'm better off than that one guy with the peg leg and the foggy eye.

The third, however, is possibly the most frustrating of all: whatever you're thinking, somebody has already thought it. Honestly, anything. When one of my University professors once told all his students 'There is no such thing as original thought - all you're doing is regurgitating somebody else's ideas', we all wanted to rebel. The older I get (so so OLD), the more I'm willing to concede that at best, original thought is very very VERY difficult to obtain, and even if you do manage this rare distinction, you're likely to see your original thought unknowingly copied by somebody somewhere else.

Why am I sharing this now? Two discoveries just today of somebody having gone where I wanted to go before me, before I knew I wanted to go there.

Firstly, like all good little bloggers, I've been considering the future of this humble blog. A quick Google search confirmed what I'd already guessed: hundreds of bloggers have grown out of Blogger before me, and all of these appear to be advised to move towards their own domain and the WordPress platform. That's ok, I'm prepared to follow the herd, but that's not what smarted worst.

No, what smarted worst is discovering that www.reillusioned.com already exists. And yes, it's somebody else's WordPress blog. And - insult to injury - they never made a single post, since initializing the platform in March 2012. That strikes so close to the bone because it wasn't until December that I even thought of the title 'Reillusioned' for my little blog here, and until now when I decided to migrate to WordPress. Pipped to the post on both scores!

The second realisation is that another dream of mine has also been dashed. When I was informed by Dreamhost that www.reillusioned.com was unavailable, I immediately searched for another magic string that had been knocking around the back of my head, hoping to one day be born into a website I've been thinking about: www.thisisromania.com. Yes, you guessed it - it's already been taken.

Here's the stinging part: it seems like an awesome site! The Romanian flag, proudly displayed; the stories of inspirational Romanians; the beautiful photos of Romanian landscapes (oh man I can't wait to visit in December!) ... all present and accounted for. Pretty much everything I'd been thinking about, although my version would have had a brighter colour scheme (take THAT originality!).

Back to the drawing board on all counts, it seems. I still want to upgrade to WordPress, but I'm going to have to select some URL that nobody will ever have thought of or ever want to copy in the future. I'm also going to have to think of an equally awesome future-proof idea for the website, because even the idea for this site is going to become a bit moot once I eventually move to Romania.

You've been warned. If you ever type in www.reillusioned.blogspot.com and come up with no results, try www.myREALLYawesomewebsiteTHATnobodyWILLeveryCOPYeveryinAmillionYEARS93847847739294384732.com